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Dear chiQ..
A while back I was feeling very lonely, I kept thinking everyone around
me was looking at me, in my mind, everyone who looked at me was making
nasty stereotypical snarky remarks towards my hair, dress sense, and general
grooming ... everyone who I came into contact with automatically ignored
me all people looked down their noses at me - gosh! I couldn't even get
the library chick to dig me.
Then it came to me. I had to just get away from it all. I decided
to go to a big lan in auckland called rebirth, there .. atleast .. I knew
I would atleast be with equally degenerate quake blobs. At last, I had
found a place where I could be accepted.
A day into the lan, and my sexual instinct kicked in ... the testosterone
within my lower glands swelled, and the bloodlust for fresh white meat
increased my Hit Points and Charisma by 100%
Then I saw her.. An angel.. an angel in tight black pants.
The way she just strafed around the map made me tingle with sensual
delight.. ohh those backflips, and the way she gripped that shaft so tight
and just drove it towards me with painful energetic force !!.. ohhh, I
set my cg_railtrailTime to 10000000 so even when she had left me, her
railtrails she left in my mind as a gift of her presense.
My question to you Dear chiQ, is do I have a chance with this woman
?
~ moocow
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It sounds to me like you found Nirvana. No petal, not the LA sad-sacks
we all know and despise - or mourn *cough* I mean an idyl, made up of
one part Valhalla, two parts sp00t. To be so misplaced, then enter your
own arena only to find perfection waiting for you there...aaaaaaaw yeah,
you must have thought all your birthdays had come at once!
Of course you should always look outside your sphere as well as in it,
but lets face it, we're always happier with those who share common interests,
ideals, and fettishes. A Quake chick is obviously what you seek in life,
and I take it this piece of geek-meat was just that. Congratulations on
gaining a peek at what might be...
Do you dream of running your hands over those firm, sculpted buttocks?
Do you covet the taste of those lips moving on yours with little gasps
of warm breathe escaping across your cheek every now and then? Do you
dream of being able to bury your face in the cleavage of those soft, velvety
breasts? Have you thought about what it would be like to feel those long,
silky, and surprisingly powerful legs wrapped around your hips? If you
answered yes to any or all of these questions you're in a healthy state
and I congratulate you.
Finally, to answer your question, no. Major does perform very elegant
back flips, and she's beautifully sculpted, but I'm sad to say she's not
real. She's a player model. Better luck next time stud. At least
you know what a girl looks like now.
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Boxers or briefs?
ToiletDuck
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Oooh I know the answer to that one. Of course my answer is driven by
perving preferences more than anything else, but I can always drop in
the old testicular health excuse: BOXERS!
Briefs are so unflattering. Unless a man has the ultimate tusch, a nice
set of tackle, and firm, powerful thighs...[mmmm thighs]...briefs are
always going to show up the worst, hide the best, and look in general
like the poor sod borrowed his grandad's old, wash-greyed jockeys. When
I'm president of the world wearing briefs will be a capital offence.
Boxers on the other hand are flattering, healthy, and allow easy access
in case of an emergency. You simply can't go wrong if you let the schlong
hang long.
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Can I get Levin's phone Number ? I'm desparate. =P
X^Vertagoat :P
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Sure. |
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Hi ChiQ
Im a 20 year old male. (how depressing to finally leave teendom)
Anyway... Heres my problem..
Im stuck in a social circle I dont want to be in. My friends are the
type of people who were the 'cool' or 'popular' ones at school. I have
known these people since I was in primary school, and wound up in their
social circle. For the most time, I have enjoyed being friends with them.
Until now.
Ive realised they dont care about me, or anyone else, as long as they
keep up their 'popluarity' or keep scoring the girls. These guys are ultimate
'dawgs' , and I get a bad name because of it.
These guys give me a hard time because I refuse to treat girls like shit.
They always have 2 or 3 girls on the go at once. They have absolutely
no understanding of the word love.
They are so insecure they have to put other people down.
Also the drugs are another thing I wish to get away from. I find
myself often snorting speed, popping 'E' or tabbing out on Acid.
Im in a place I dont want to be, and I dont know how to escape. I
find it so hard to meet new people.
How does one completely cut off what has been such a big part of their
life?
These people are crippling me mentally.. I find myself so insecure
around them, because I am not like them..
I cannot be myself around them, because it will just be another thing
to make fun of, to help their own insecurity.
Also, i find myself becoming more like them , the more time i spend
with them. I now judge people on appaerance. I find it hard to be friends
with a girl who is not attractive. Or a guy who is not 'cool' or 'tough'
or have that certain persona around them .. I am finding it so much harder
to accept people for who they are. let alone accepting my self for who
I am.
I often find myself borderline on exploding sometimes. They often
taunt and mock eachother, and i feel that if it comes my way for much
longer, I will snap and hurt one of them. And this is something i dont
want to happen. Because i will do a good job of it.
How do i escape??
The only thing that comes to mind, is to pack up what little i have,
and leave the country. Leaving it all behind.
...
alone in my mind...
(anon - not disclosed)
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I went to school with BPs (Beautiful People) so I'm well aware of the
type of clique you mean. It gets quite incestuous when the group has worked
it's way around all the compatible candidates of the same sex and they
start swapping mounts mid-race. Hollywood has the portrayal of the BP
clique down to a fine art. Those bad frat-house and high school misfit
movies of the eighties are like wildlife documentaries from the jungles
that are institutes of learning the world over.
You know how all those films end don't you? The misfit and the BP at
the centre of the story always win...by cutting ties with the BP's affiliates.
The thing is in the films the BP's are never remotely sincere in their
regard for the BP who's breaking away or the incoming misfit. This is
the material point in your case I think. Are your obnoxious friends genuine,
or are they genuine arseholes?
Your desire for 'the real thang', mutual respect, and some self-esteem
would indicate that you're a pretty rational guy. Perhaps you should test
your friends a little and approach them individually with your thoughts
on the subject. It would be a bit unfair on them for you to discard them
as easily as they discard their latest amorous victim, and it's unfair
on yourself to just unquestioningly follow a group mentality you find
distasteful. Dip your toe in the proverbial stream that is your social
life and see if it falls off.
It appears the elitist, sociopathic outlook of your cronies has survived
the trial by fire that is the graduation from school to RealLife™
at any rate. This is a good indicator that it's not going anywhere by
itself. I'd have to recommend you be the bigger man that your scruples
lead me to believe you are and proactively [eeeeeew! psychobabble]
explore the nature of your relationship with these people. It may be that
you're better off getting the hell out of dodge, or it may be that you
need to just let them know how you feel and wean yourself off them and
onto a new circle of more cerebral and sensitive people. The solution
may lie somewhere in between. Whatever, you need to do something. Don't
accept second-rate company.
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Dear ChiQ,
Seeing as you hastenly called me a snu on my last letter, this question
has come to my knowledge: "DOES CHIQ KNOW WHAT A SNU IS?"
Yours Truly,
Nuclear
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Hell yes. A snu is a small male gamer with a miniscule tinky winky, wirey,
powerful wrists, and a big flat arse...
...er, no actually I haven't a clue. Enlighten me.
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Hi chiQ,
i'd like to know where I stand on the issue of peeing in the shower.
I've been told by alot of people that peeing in the shower isn't acceptable
behavior, and it's unclean. Should i stop going for a tinkle when i have
a shower? Is it really that disgusting?
I would never do wee wee in someone elses home, but at home i'll
often, if not every time relieve myself down the plug'ole.
It's not because i'm lazy, it's because when i wake up the last thing
i want to contend with is trying to aim for the bowl, pissing in the shower
is much more relaxing.
Tinkle on!
-duckstab
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Well, I don't know where you stand, but I stand firmly over the plughole.
Pee your heart out baybee. I think so long as you draw a line somewhere
(anywhere will do, so long as it's not drawn with anything too unsavoury)
you're obviously aware that others may not accept your propensity for
leaving your mark, and so will exercise discretion. Set your rules, live
by them, and don't start experimenting with number twos and you're away
laughing.
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